Recipe for Life?

I love to cook - sometimes. I tend to go through spurts where I am eager to find new recipes to try. Most of the time, though, I go to my trusted meals that don't require me to measure ingredients or put much thought into what I'm cooking. Regardless of how much effort I put in, there is still a process I need to follow or the meal will be inedible. I will burn it, under-cook it, or the seasonings will be off and I will hear something like, "Ewww...this is gross!" from my five year old.

The boot camp life my husband and I have been in for this season of our lives has taken us down some painful and unexpected roads, particularly over the last several months. Shortly after our kids' school let out in the spring, I took them back to Maine for our first visit since heading to the south. I think in some ways, I was hoping to escape "boot camp" even if just for a little while. A reprieve would have been nice. Due to my husband's work schedule, we had to leave him behind knowing we would meet up with him after two weeks when he would join us for the last leg of the trip. Three days after we left NC, I got the call that I have been anticipating for a while - my husband had lost his job. That news turned our trip from vacation back into a time of crisis for us.

Many people in the United States are experiencing unemployment. We are not the only ones who know what it's like to wonder how bills will be paid, how we will buy groceries, and even whether or not we will need to relocate. It's a roller coaster ride to say the least. I have found myself in phases where I rely solely on God. Then that gets cut short by my mind wandering around and wondering how this will play out for us as a family. I often get wrapped up in analysis mode of our decisions and whether we made the right ones. Were all of these happenings a result of selfishness? Had we fallen out of God's will by our resolve to leave Maine and move where we had no safety nets? I have stayed in that place for a time and then would go back around to the truth that if God cares for the birds of the air, He cares so much more for me.

Last year during one of my endless trips through the carpool lane at my children's school, I heard a radio show where a woman spoke about how we often think that life is like a recipe. We add a little of this, a lot of that, stir it, bake it, and pop it out of the pan - and voila, we can expect a good result. It will taste great and the people around us will love it and admire us for it. But from what I know about God, I cannot imagine He operates that way. He isn't about following a set of rules and everything will be wonderful. What would the need be for us to seek Him? 

In a lot of ways, I'm tired of thinking, talking, or even analyzing this boot camp thing. After just typing that I wondered what annoys me about it. I think maybe because that season is winding down. We are moving out of that time of heavy-duty refining. Now I desperately want to see what will come now that we are stronger and see life in a much different way.

While I haven't been writing a lot, I have been busy. My husband and I decided our son, who was entering sixth grade needed a bit of time decompressing from the pressures of public school. I am a homeschooling mom and a public school mom. I am also thankful to report that my husband's unemployment did not last very long - he loves his new job! Classes for me start back up in a week and I could not be more excited! Stay tuned for details in this area...God has been so faithful as He orchestrates each instrument, note, and the players in my life.

Obviously God's goodness and love is not conditional. Sometimes He turns up the heat even when we are obedient and in His will. We cannot control God with our recipes. It's funny to think that I've even tried. But it is incredible to see how perfectly every event ties into the symphony of our lives and those reminders of how His ways are always greater and beyond our comprehension.